My marriage was quite interesting to say the least. We both come from the same family. We are first cousins. My mother is his dad’s younger sister. Our family has arranged our union long before any of us understood what marriage meant. We flew to Bangladesh.
My husband and I were engaged when I was 12 years old. It was more like spoken vows between our families. At that time I was a pretty confused child with braces and glasses. Just going along with the flow of what my guardians told me to do, like a good 12 year old girl. I didn’t understand what was happening at the time.
He was older than me by about 6 years. I can’t speak for what was going on in his mind. I know I didn’t take it well after we came back home to New York. I was rebelling as any teen would. My family was always hammering me about how I am not speaking to him or writing letters to him.
I began to see him as my enemy. I continued to rebel against the idea of being engaged to him and didn’t give it much thought. I continued going to school and living my life not fully understanding that I was committed to a man no a boy half way across the ocean, waiting for me to get some common sense knocked into her brain.
We moved down south to Texas in 1999 and I started high school. As I was coming to the ripe marriageable age. My parents felt it was time to make my engagement official.
It was getting serious in my house. So if I was going to fly across the ocean to marry him, I figured I needed to get to know him a little, right?
We spoke a handful of times over the phone and he seemed nice. I liked the sound of his voice – it wasn’t creepy or anything. My requirements of a guy back then was by the sound of his voice!
I look back at these memories and I’m laughing at all the silly things I did. It’s good to have a good sense on humor.
I remember him telling me on the phone that the first time he sees me after all these years – he wanted to see me in a Red Sari! Seriously! Does he realize I am going to be flying 18 hours – Was he for real?
We didn’t have Facetime back then. That makes me sound so old! But old is gold!
The next thing I knew I was in for the shock of my life. I’m in a plane – thinking myself all high and mighty and pretty untouchable – that’s just how my brain worked – I was 18 years old!
Give me a break.
So here I am standing in the airport in Bangladesh with an overwhelming presence of being surrounded by so much extended family. The sights, sounds, smells. Where did my parents bring me! I was in a total culture shock!
I was going through a kaleidoscope of emotions and then suddenly like a magic – the heavens opened up – I suddenly had tunnel vision and everything around me disappeared … except
I thought this stuff only happened in movies but NOPE it’s so REAL.
I was standing there face to face with this boy – my enemy – my nemesis – the bane of my existence – who is now a man. A very Handsome, Intense, Animalistic Attraction kind of Man.
And – I was so not wearing that blasted red sari! I wore a 2 piece white suit – blazers and all – What was I thinking?!
Our eyes locked and the charge was electric. Even as we stood apart among all of the family surrounding us in welcome.
Does love at first sight exist? Because that’s exactly how it happened. I laid eyes on him and the rest was history.
At least that’s how it was for me anyway ..
We official spoke our vows (Nikka) on July 16th, 2004.
I flew back to Texas just a few months after my marriage. It was one of the hardest things I’ve done. Leaving him standing on the other side of airport security. Our hreats were torn literally in two.
God had plans for us. Our story was just getting started.
We came together in March of 2006 when my husband began his life in the states. We officially start our married life.
Surprisingly we got along perfectly fine even though we have never spent any time dating or getting to know each other very well before we married. I can say that after all these years we are in perfect harmony of each other.